Bake Off star Nadiya says she won’t accept an arranged marriage for her daughter

If we had to recall the moment when mum-of-three Nadiya Hussain won The Great British Bake Off in 2015, the first thing that would spring to mind is her beaming smile.

But this is not how she remembers it.

According to Nadiya, behind that smile was a terrified and sweaty young woman who had no idea of the world that was waiting for her.

‘It was the most anxiety-inducing thing I’ve ever done in my life,’ she reveals.

‘I was petrified. But now when I meet people just like me, who haven’t had the confidence to do something, and they say, “Well, if you can do it, so can I,” I know what I do means something. That’s what keeps me going. It makes me so happy.’

Since winning, she’s definitely been on a journey of self-discovery (as they say in the reality TV world). But for hijab-wearing Nadiya, a British Muslim woman on TV, to say she’s been on an epic journey would be an understatement.

She’s back on our screens with Nadiya Bakes this week doing what we all know and love her for, but in the last five years, she has won the hearts of the nation, becoming a Great British treasure.

Nadiya has fronted TV family food shows and travelled to make a documentary tracing her Bangladeshi roots. She’s baked the Queen’s 90th birthday cake and was awarded an MBE.

Plus, she’s penned fiction books and an emotionally powerful memoir revealing for the first time sexual abuse and a suicide attempt. Nadiya has bravely spoken out about her anxiety struggles and overcoming trauma, and now campaigns for better mental health awareness.

I’m not sure how we did it, but we got through all of the above (well, she does talk very fast and openly), and we still had time to natter about her favourite cake…

How does it feel to be back baking again?

Well, obviously I have been doing a lot of baking in the meantime. But this is the first baking TV show I’ve done in a while. I would have definitely shied away from it five years ago.

But it’s a very different story for me now. Having travelled and met so many inspirational people, I think this life has always lived in me.

You filmed your new show during the pandemic. What was that like?

We did it towards the end of lockdown and only finished it a few weeks back. We made it over 14 days on location with a small crew who bubbled together. They became my extended functional family.

I always say, when you bake bread together you become family, whether you’re related by blood or not. It was crazy how we did it, but it was wonderful to be back at work after months of lockdown.

How did you find lockdown with three kids in the house?

My family are the best ointment. I felt like our family was a team. In it together. The kids have been so good at adapting to this new way of living. My children are used to seeing their grandparents and getting love from them.

My daughter said to me, ‘I really miss going round to grandma’s and sitting on her floor.’

You see, when my kids go over to hers, she waits on them hand and foot. She makes them the sweetest cup of tea you’ve ever tasted in your life. Then she butters bread and sandwiches it with sugar, then it melts when dipped into the tea. The taste is incredible.

What’s it like in the kitchen Chez Hussains?

Recently, we’ve been making lots of spicy salads together. My kids are like, how can salads taste so good? If my husband makes salad it’s lettuce, chopped up cucumber and cherry tomatoes. So I win!

My daughter Maryam, who’s nine, is an amazing baker. She decided to make cupcakes the other day all by herself. My boys Musa, 13, and Dawud, 12, like making samosas. It’s really good, as I can sit back a bit more. I say to friends, wait until you get your kids cleaning the toilet and then you’re laughing!

Your children clean the toilets?

Growing up in my culture, the girls were especially encouraged to cook and clean. It was a generational thing. I knew when I had a family I would not do the same. Every Sunday, all my kids clean the entire house in a three-hour intense clean, including the tops of the door frames.

Then on Wednesdays, we do a mid-week quick clean like the toilets and mopping the floor. We’ve also got four chickens, a budgie, a rabbit and a cat, so every morning the kids clean and feed the animals. In between all that they’ve got to think about praying, homework and teaching.

Are you a strict mum?

I just want to raise my children with manners. I want them to respect the wisdom of their elders – something I don’t see much of in this country. I want my boys to respect women too and value them.

I know without a shadow of a doubt, my sons will get married and their wives will come back to me and say you raised one heck of a man. That is my life-long dream, for someone to say I raised a wonderful son. My mother-in-law raised a wonderful son and all respect to her.

You’ve always said you got lucky with your husband Abdal (in an arranged marriage at the age of 20)

He’s a wonderful human and the most supportive man ever – to me and the children. I know everyone says this, but they do have the best dad in the whole world. I am the sister who turns up and never slags off their husband.

That said, I would never accept an arranged marriage for my daughter. I don’t have the time. Once they’ve left home and got on with their own lives, I want to buy a sports car and drive off! I’m still questioning whether I’ll take my husband with me. Ask me in a few years!

You have half a million followers on social media now…

I know! It’s such a big responsibility. I went from being responsible for three children, to then looking at my social feed seeing hundreds and thousands of people following me. I like to think I’m very real, there’s nothing fake about it. I don’t want my son to look at it and think, ‘Gosh Mum, you’re very different to who you are at home.’ I’m just who I am.

Have you experienced any racism in the telly world?

There have been moments working in media when I have thought it’s not where I belong. And that’s been a bitter pill to swallow. I haven’t always thought there’s space for me.

But I tell myself and my kids, ‘Keep your elbows out’. My grandad started it when he moved to the UK from Bangladesh and was beaten by racists. If he’d given up and gone back home, we wouldn’t be here today. This is why I say it’s more than just about baking for me, it’s about finding a place for me in this industry.

And when you’re not being a revolutionary change-maker, where can we find you relaxing?

At home. Cooking dinner with the kids or having tea with Abdal and a slice of cake – probably my favourite carrot cake or lemon drizzle. Although I also love a Bourbon biscuit dunked in clotted cream!

I also love watching Gogglebox, it’s been a guilty pleasure. I annoy Abdal by talking at the telly.

Nadiya Hussain on overcoming her difficult past

Nadiya suffered sexual abuse as a child, and a suicide attempt aged 10. These experiences have shaped who she is today…

‘Our past and experiences are the things we always carry around with us. For such a long time I tried to smile, wear colourful clothes and ignore the fact that those scars were there.

The difference now having written my memoir is that I feel like the scars are all there, but I can still be the person behind a perfectly polished countertop, with a perfect cake, smiling with joy in my eyes. That’s who I am. But the reality is it’s not who I am all the time.’

‘We can be two versions of ourselves. What I’ve learnt over the last few years is to be happy with every part of me, whether it be the beautiful bits or the broken bits. It’s all me.’

‘I’m not someone who’s good at giving myself praise. And I pay for that in some ways. I can be so productive to a point where I make myself exhausted. We’ve all been there, especially if you have kids, where you feel it’s give, give, give.’

‘I’ve had to teach myself to only do things that mean something to me. It’s more than just baking and cooking and being on the telly, for me. As a first-generation British Bangladeshi woman of colour and Muslim, there’s no one really like me.

There’s loads of things close to my heart that I feel like I need to be part of. But that said, I have a young family and I have to balance caring for them. I suffer a lot with mum guilt, don’t we all?’

– Nadiya Bakes is on September 8, BBC2. Nadiya’s American Adventure will be on BBC1 later this year